New Year's Eve

So today's the last day of 2011.

What plans have you got for yourself?

Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer.

Love is you.

Thoughts

*Disclaimer: Extremely wordy post

Society is a wicked place to live in and reality is most of the time, cruel.

Let's be real, we are all judged based on our looks rather than based on our personalities.

Currently, only society has the rights to deem what is attractive and what is not.

Guess what? Most of us ends up in loserville. 

Who doesn't want to be deem attractive? I'm sure all of you out there wants to be attractive, wants to feel attractive and wants to be deemed acceptable by society.

Sorry to burst your bubble but reality is cruel and the world will always be unfair.

There is just going to be that one person who looks way better than you do.

No matter how hard you try to make yourself look attractive and good looking, there's just that one person who's going to make you feel fucking inferior.

Let's talk about us girls. 

Sometimes, I really wonder. What's the deal with having big boobs and huge asses?

Why do we NEED BIG BOOBS AND HUGE ASSES?
To please men? To be deemed acceptable by society? 

For god's sake boobs and asses are just filled with fats!

Then tell me, why are fat girls generally not accepted by society when they are filled with fats themselves?

I'm not trying insult anyone here but do you get what I mean?

Not to mention having a pretty face is a must to be fucking deemed attractive.

Pretty face + Big boobs + Huge ass = Attractive?

Fuck society.

How about the rest of us that doesn't qualify?

What are we deemed as? UGLY OF COURSE. We can't help it if we look ugly can we? 

If we could, I'm sure all of us wants to look pretty, have big boobs and ass. 

We want to be attractive too you know? But like I've said, the world will never be fair. It's just whether you are born lucky or not.

Some of us are not born attractive. We can't help it. It's not like we don't want to be attractive, we just can't because we're born looking like that. 

So we try to make ourselves look and feel better by doing things like make-up, plastic surgery or botoxes and we get fucking blamed just because we want to be deemed acceptable by society?

What logic is this? Do we have to apologise for being ugly now? God.

 But then again, I'm just thankful for the people around me who still loves and accepts me for who I am.

I'll admit I'm not pretty or gorgeous or anything like that and yes, I do wish I was pretty and attractive but what can I do? I'm born this way. 

It is hard because criticisms are every fucking where, but I'm still trying to love and accept myself.

*

Sometimes, I long for someone who genuinely thinks I'm beautiful even when I'm barely there.

Even when society thinks otherwise.

Luv.

Zirca on friday.

Midnight movie on saturday.

Stay home sunday.

Best weekend ever.

Overdue pictures: 

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Update

Hi. Did you miss me?

Feeling really lazy to update my life in this lifeless blog. As always.

I kinda have a fetish for quirky-looking spectacles like the one I'm wearing above.

Headed down town with Anna just last week. 

I haven't seen this girl for quite some time because sadly, we're in different class now and also, she's been partying almost every single week. Lucky bitch.

So anyway, my complexion is getting from worse to worst.

Just so you know, pictures are deceiving. Yes, I erased all the visible pimples out of this picture because they are as disgusting as hell.

I am not lying. Here's an original picture before editing: 

Compare the difference!

I don't understand how acne developed itself on my face in such a short period of time and it's fucking fucking fucking horrible.

This was taken during this year's June. Look at how clean my face was. Pimples free. No edits, no nothing. 

Because of my acne, I'm too depressed to even get out of my house and face the world. But I still did, unfortunately. It's not like I can give school a miss or give up my social life just because of my stupid acne.

I'd just never thought that this day would ever come but guess what? It fucking did. I'm thinking it's most probably karma for dissing others when they had acne as well. I bet their faces are squeaky clean now.

I feel sorry now.

I don't even know why I'm sharing this but at the very least, I'm being truthful and honest here with everyone.

I'm doing whatever I can to save my face right now and hopefully it recovers soon. 

Otherwise, I'm seeing a dermatologist.

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